Patience; the new endurance sport.

I lived!  The past 9 days has really been a ride. Although I ran close to 50 miles last week, my 'long' run was only 12 miles. Then due to Sunday, and work going from 4:00 a.m. to 11:00 p.m. on Monday, I couldn't get away.  Two days later.....I ran 5 miles, decided to use the sides of the trail rather than the asphault and had an amazing run.  All that spongy debris gave me confidence to really stride.  That plus I enjoyed the small obstacle challenges.  At the end, I did have to get back on the pavement toward the end, and felt like sprinting-- I went  all out for about 1/16th. I felt great.   Hips and back are feeling much better after the rest.

Josse and I switched our day--which works better for both of us (well, now that it's summer).  She needs to take it easy post hard Tuesday work-outs, and I need to ramp it up.  8:30's are my race pace and 8:30's is her 'easy' pace.  Today I didn't bring my dogs-- and what do you think-- no one was on the trail to be bothered.  Figures.  It was a nice  cool morning, but darker with the few clouds in the East.  The river wasn't quite as cold today as it was last week (rain run off instead of snow melt is my guess).  These rainy days have left everything so lush, fragrant, and green. I can't get over the smell and the feeling in the air.   Everything is so alive. The river is running high and the sound of it almost takes my breath away.  The rain has left the air humid, I can feel it on my skin (especially when I stop running and I'm suddenly dripping rivulets of sweat).  My yard (although filled with weeds) is about to explode with roses.  I cut two of my favorites that have just bloomed to perfection (Hope and Ingrid Bergman) to Josse to take back to her daughter. I should see a whole bush full of them in the next 4 days.  Roses are just so fat and proud and strong.  It's hard to not get all poetic about them.

I woke up this morning in my clothes, in the exact same position I fell asleep in.  I thought I was going to lay down for just a second while my kids got ready for bed around 9:30.  I was really disoriented when I opened my eyes.  It was really, really light outside and I thought it was still the afternoon of the day before.  How's that for exhausted?  Don't ask me why.  It's latent I guess from last week.  Sadly, I slept right through my running hour and had to go to work all slovenly and unbathed.  Luckily it was cool and cloudy when I got to run in the very late afternoon.  The river is at an almost frightening level.  I've never seen it this high in June.  I guess the resevoir is full and they're letting more downstream.  Every week  I tell myself I'm going to get a kayak.  I'm kicking myself I don't have one right this second.  Saw a girl riding her bike down the trail today and she was reading a book.  I've tried to walk and read, but ride a bike and read? 

10:06/9:51/8:39/8:32/8:46/9:39 

Ran the first 2.5 easy.  Ran into Jeff and Sasha around the lake about 2.5, turned around to run a 1 + with them before they started an interval.  Nice to have a good reason to run faster than I would alone.  Sasha likes to point out, in an encouraging way, when we're running an 8 m/m pace.  I know I can run a few miles that way.  I've run a few 7:45' in races and attempting tempo runs.  I just don't LIKE to.  It's hard. Just being ouside for an hour or more every day is my victory. I know, it's sad to enjoy something I'm not even that good at.  So, everyone's doing Utah Valley next week.  Sasha and Jeff (or maybe just Jeff) are going to try to "slow" their first miles to 5:50's to see if it saves them energy to do 4:50s (?) for the last 6.  They talked to me of fat vs. carb burning paces, and why not just run fast at the earlier part of the race if you're just going to burn the same....Me and my 10 minute mile just couldn't agree more!!  My goals for UVM are lofty. ...I just don't want to fall down and break my hip.  I know, I know, aim for the stars!

We didn't leave until 7:00 but the morning was fresh along the trail. I was surprized it was such a beautiful morning;  pristine skies, cool air, river high.   There was still some dust left over from the winds yesterday and the lake was all churned up from the run-off, but still.  It was steeple chase morning. Days after big wind there are millions of tree branches that line the trail you have to avoid or jump over. If the trail had been clear, I might have put reins on Catherine and brought my rollerblades. She's running with such grace and ease.  I need to get her running with some real runners, but she's shy.  I enjoy our runs so much, but I'm just not running like I have in years past. It makes me feel bad to be holding her back. She's only 26 and has so much room for improvement.  She's been on her treadmill running 7:30's for like half an hour at a time.  It's not in me to not try and encourage her to do her best. Today, it took me real effort to maintain a 8:59 pace for the whole distance. I don't know what to think. That used to be my easy pace.  If I run more miles and train more, speed picks up naturally, but then I'm at higher risk for injury/re-injury.  If I run slower, I lose some running friends (if not lose them, slow them down and become their charity partner).  I just don't know why it's so different this year.  But I have to take the taper more seriously this time around, and I'm not going to push next Saturday other than to make an honest effort.  I am looking forward to it--although that loopy-loop at the end is making me crazy to think about.  By the time I hit 23 I become violently exhausted and angry about it.  I have not yet been able to refocus that energy inward. Considering this, I just do not want to run a mile loop before the finish line.  What a crappy ending. I've got to mentally prepare for that one.

What a beautiful run in the fresh, luscious morning rain. The freshly blooming everything and rushing river have me filled to overflowing with a daily quota of green beauty and fragrance.  I got new shoes last week and now they only have 14 or so miles.  So they feel great.  Although, I have yet to use them for a long run so I'm not sure if I should use them for Saturday-- or stick to my old faithfuls that are 26.2 miles short of 500.  I ran 4 miles today (instead of the 5-6 I wanted) trying to hold back,. I remembered last Fall,  right befor SGM,  I ran into Sasha on the trail who told me I was running too fast.  So today, and all week I will make a conscienteous effort to go easy.  Of course, when I got home, I did a million things, thereby negating all effects of the 'easy' run....Whatever. 

I ran 3 easy miles with my resentful 10 year old son tagging along.  He'd WANTED to come, he'd been ASKING to come with me (on MY runs, in the mornings).  We've run 2 miles together lots of times with pretty good success.  So I picked the day I'd be running the easiest, gave him  plenty of warning the day before, and got him up, while my daughter was at soccer.  He whined the whole way, lagged behind much of the time, but then would sprint meters ahead of me.  He walked maybe 1/3 of the distance. I was trying to keep in mind all of the things my Dad would said to me while we ran.  But I was too scared of my Dad to be that resentful or lag that far behind.  So I didn't even know what to say but to keep running slowly and be positive and encouraging when he did pick up his heels.  I want him to like it, eventually. He ran an 8 minute mile this year at school (down from 9 m/m last year) and won the Presidential Physical Fitness award (only 1 of 2 winners, if you can believe that).  So I thought he'd be ready for 3 .  I hope we get to do it many more times this summer to practice and improve his consistancy. In the meantime, I don't know what I did to my back/pririformis yesterday.  I leaned over to pick something up and put it in the garbage, and it was like someone plucked a guitar string in my lower back down through my leg. I iced/ibuprofened and everything, but it's still sore and I'm not walking without pain.  Darn, I almost made it 100% to the start....I've been so careful. I'll panic manana if it's not any better.

Thank you to Josse who blogged a positive affirmation that I chanced to read just before bed. " I WILL get better"  I said this over and imagined it over again as I went to sleep (while lying on top of a blue gel ice pack and 800 mg of Ibuprofen).  I woke up and the pain was about 70% gone.  I  took my daughter to soccer and then ran a really easy 3.  It is so lush outside it almost brings me to tears.  I can't wait for Saturday just because I'm pretty sure it's going to be a beautiful cool-ish day going down the canyon. Just as I was stretching my finish, Sasha and Jeff passed and invited me to another mile. So we jogged and chatted about Sarah and Kimya and Saturday.  I've now been sitting on ice for over 48 hours, and I have to warn you (in case you didn't know) ice really does burn your skin.  In a panic to get that piriformitis under control, I've left pillowy red welts on my bum from sitting on blue gel ice packs.

Ten years ago today the nurse midwife looked at my huge belly and said "You do realize you're pregnant? Surely you understand that the baby has to come out sometime."  This she said to me as I was 2 weeks overdue with no labor in sight.  I liked that lady.  She talked tough and grew up with cowboy brothers on a farm in Wyoming.  She had the hands and skin to prove it. Her confidence in birthing stuff won me over and eight hour later, in spite of my reluctance to turn myself inside out that day, she delivered my son and handed him to me in a single motion. He was hot, 98.6 degrees, and steamy fresh.  It was shocking.  It was surprising how he was not there one second, and then right there the next.  Within five minutes I couldn't believe I'd ever lived any part of my life without him.  Now it's my job to make him dislike me enough to want to move away from me and make his own life.  Weird how that works.  Happy Birthday Son! Thanks for ruining my lower abdomen, it's not your fault....really. No problem.

ZERO miles and good luck sleeping tonight.

RivertonPaul made my day with his posts.  "True beauty includes a full figure".  "You can't afford to be skinny!".  AMEN to that.  (Really, who wants to nibble the meat off a bone when you can have the whole steak :)   That's just what I needed to lighten my day because I always gain 3 pounds taper week without trying.  I'm trying to be calm about it.  But wish I could have eaten a dozen cupcakes to have at least DESERVED gaining that much weight.  I'll bet carb loading is overreated anyway. 

First of all, I am happy to report that I achieved my goal of finishing the freaking marathon without breaking more stuff.  Yay!  So to that end, I'm at peace.  I hated being licked at SG last fall.  I know people don't care about their finisher medals, but it smarted not to finish, and be beat by my hip and the weather than shrank all my tendons.  I am again, a marathon finisher.  But really, I went into it knowing that I would sink my time.  I was sort of looking forward to underachieving and having fun, which I did. Tons.  Maurine, who we will now refer to as Miles, picked me up at 4:20 a.m.  I forgot or failed to bring any single support item, including my Garmin (who cares anyway, right?).  Miles loaned me one of her old watches (which around mile 24 came in handy to see just how badly I was botching the race :)  Seriously, it was so fun. I rode the busses Miles (on Sherpa detail for Marion), Marion, and Smooth.  The weather was PERFECT, there is just no way to stress how perfect it was.  I went across the starting line with absolutely no expectations except to finish.  I was filled with the awesome beauty of the canyon, did love Carterville Road instead of the trail,  and by 13.1 had run my fastest half marathon ever--I was 1:54 by the watch and 1:57 by the timer. For a while there, I considered a 3:50 finish, but my back/hip really started to ache by 15 and kept it SLOW after that.  Around the time I slowed down a very annoying Englishman wanted to pace with me and began talking about how the Pakistani's and African Immigrants are ruining England, and how there are only 5 "whites" on the city council in Manchester and Leeds (the whole place is like 70% Packi's he said) ( I then  pointed out that at least it was representative of the population and offered that I was married to a foreigner, and then he finally shut up and fell back--which was my goal).   Funny, I love to share my weekday and long runs with friends when I can, but I do not like to talk or listen to you talk during races. Mile 18 was my house, where I had to wait about 3 minutes because every kid in the neighborhood had made me a sign and a cheering squad that was 'not quite ready' by the time I was going by.  Quick kisses and hugs all the way around, then gorgeous home turf running.  What a gorgeous day, did I mention that?  The birds were so loud, the river so wide and clean. Ahhh.  But I was hurting and knew that I wouldn't really know where I stood time-wise until mile 24.  No Bathrooms for 2 miles at the end of the race sucked.  I had to wait literally 10 minutes (3 people deep) for the one port-a-potty in 5 miles.  As I expected, by that time I was over 4:00 and just gave it up compeltely and started stopping to stretch, walk and jog.  It was very liberating to do whatever the heck I wanted to do.  Then as I was coming to the end, there were all my kids (mine and the neighborhood) waiting to run me to the end.  My finishing picture will have at least four 12 year old girls ushering me to the finish.  I could not have been happier.  Smooth came in next , AnnaLisa.  Then I checked the numbers for Josse (awesome) and Sasha and Jeff.  It made me very happy for them.  Then I sadly noticed that if I had held a decent pace from 23 miles on, I would have placed 5th in my division.  That was sort of a bummer to realize it wasn't as much of a throw away race as I'd imagined...oops. I guess there's next year.  Then a bit later Marion and Miles.  It made me cry to see them. Inspiring for the amount of support Maurine offered, and the insistance and will of Marion to finish.  Then I drank 2 free bottles of chocolate milk, ate a creamy and went home with my whole gang.  What a happy day!

Question: Why do your kids build a huge Star-Wars Multi-Teird Lego Universe on the stairs the day AFTER the marathon?  Answer:  Because it's just not funny enough already to watch you go down them.  Who knew I worked my quads that much?  I thought that because my effort was so easy, I'd escape the lactic acid build up. But I did keep an 8 minute pace (which is a good race pace for me) for about 15 miles. I guess that was enough.  Glad I could give them a laugh.

I aggressively stretched hips, quads, glutes, hams last night and again this morning.  both yesterday and today, I ran super slow, very enjoyable 2 miles.  But I could feel my back/hip/bum stiff and inflexible.  It did feel like it was the right thing to try to run a bit though.  Get thing moving.  Came home, did 400 sit ups, 40 push ups, and several sun salutations.  Here's a great story.  I got pulled over for speeding yesterday (I know, if I could run as fast as I drive....).   The officer came over to the car to get my lisence/registration....saw the marathon medal on the passenger seat and asked me if I ran on Saturday, how I'd placed (I told him 11th in my division) and then he just looked ahead, patted my roof and said "have a nice day, slow down."   I didn't realize you could run a marathon in lieu of traffic school.  Awesome.

I arose from the dead about Thursday.  I will spare you the sad details of my illness, but suffice it to say, I did not run for 12 days.  I have missed my faithful running pals. Thank you all for your well wishes, phone calls, and kind thoughts. I arose very late this morning (8:00 a.m.) to learn first hand what the term "Muffin Top" actually means.  Now, I lost 3-5 pounds being sick, but as the theory of relativity would have it, I also lost all muscle tone and gravity is having a heyday.  I put on my running clothes  to find my bosom overflowed my running bra, and a spare tire grew above the waistline of my shorts.  How can you have lost 5 pounds and be fatter than you were before? How does your body decide to divy up the new distribution of fat? Apprently my waist and bust have been silently duking it out over who gets the extra flab (not to be outdone by the flacid upper arm).  I know, gross.  Enough.  But what's worse than being sick and flabby, is vanity.  Anyhow, I tried to run 4 miles and I felt like the unoiled tin man creaking down the trail. The dogs however were elated.  

8:45's. My body remembers,it's my lungs still catching up. But I think the running helps speed up circulation. I listened to music today while I ran (which I NEVER do).  Yesterday I was putting together a mix for the Red-Hot-Pink-Chick's half marathon (my gift to those running it) and while I was at it, I put together a late 70's era metal mix (AC/DC, Aerosmith, Black Sabbath, etc.).  It's half irony and half nostalgia, but it sure gets the job done you're not quite 100%. 

I can not believe the difference a day makes.  I was so great yesterday, I did not expect what happened today.  I could not pick it up.   I was giving my absolute best effort only to discover I was running 9:45's.  I was out of breath, exhausted, and felt like I weighted 500 lbs.  When I got home I actually did weigh myself and was shocked that I'd actually dropped 2 more pounds (not to worry folks, I've got plenty to survive on).  I must be dehydrated and not quite better yet.  Wow.  I am so tired.  When I finished I was sweaty and spent as if I had run a marathon.  I've been waffeling about the Freedom Run, and as sad as it is to say this, I think that for the first time in 8 years, I think I'll skip it or go just to cheer for Catherine and anyone else whose running it.